Such kindness wasn't a gift but a goad, scraping against one's skin like a yoke of thorns. She would have preferred him stiff, defensive, even offensive.

Summary

This quote suggests that the kindness and generosity shown by someone is not always appreciated or desired by the recipient. Instead of feeling grateful, the person feels uncomfortable and burdened by this kindness, comparing it to a yoke of thorns that irritate and annoy. The preference would be for the person to be aloof and guarded, as this would offer a sense of security and familiarity, rather than having to confront a kind gesture that feels unfamiliar and challenging to accept.

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