Was it the act of giving birth that made you a mother? Did you lose that label when you relinquished your child? If people were measured by their deeds, on the one hand, I had a woman who had chosen to give me up; on the other, I had a woman who'd sat up with me at night when I was sick as a child, who'd cried with me over boyfriends, who'd clapped fiercely at my law school graduation. Which acts made you more of a mother?Both, I realized. Being a parent wasn't just about bearing a child. It was about bearing witness to its life.

Summary

This quote challenges the traditional notion that giving birth is what makes someone a mother. It explores the idea that being a parent is not solely defined by biological ties, but by the actions and experiences shared with a child. The quote reflects on the complexity of motherhood, highlighting that the act of giving birth alone does not determine one's role as a mother. Instead, being a parent involves actively engaging with and being emotionally present for a child throughout their life, bearing witness to their experiences, supporting them, and forming a deep bond based on shared moments and emotions.

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