Quote by Neil Gaiman
Along with the standard computer warranty agreement which said that if the machine 1) didn't work, 2) didn't do what the expensive advertisements said, 3) electrocuted the immediate neighborhood, 4) and in fact failed entirely to be inside the expensive box when you opened it, this was expressly, absolutely, implicitly and in no event the fault or responsibility of the manufacturer, that the purchaser should consider himself lucky to be allowed to give his money to the manufacturer, and that any attempt to treat what had just been paid for as the purchaser's own property would result in the attentions of serious men with menacing briefcases and very thin watches. Crowley had been extremely impressed with the warranties offered by the computer industry, and had in fact sent a bundle Below to the department that drew up the Immortal Soul agreements, with a yellow memo form attached just saying: 'Learn, guys...
Summary
This quote satirically highlights the customer warranty agreements offered by the computer industry. It sarcastically points out that no matter what goes wrong with the machine, the responsibility is always shifted to the buyer, making them feel fortunate to give their money to the manufacturer. The quote suggests that any attempts by the buyer to assert their ownership rights or seek appropriate compensation for faulty products would be met with intimidating legal actions from the company. It hints at the absurdity and lack of accountability in such warranty agreements.
By Neil Gaiman