Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.

God created war so that Americans would learn geography.

Mark Twain

Psychiatric expert testimony: mendacity masquerading as medicine.

Thomas Szasz

Every moment in our lives is a miracle we should enjoy instead of ignoring.

Yoko Ono

The parent knows instinctively that if they're working and setting an example for their child that means that child is more likely to be in school, more likely to stay out of trouble and more likely to complete their education.

John Engler

This ain't fun. But you watch me, I'll get it done.

Jackie Robinson

I think God has a tremendous sense of humor.

Rainn Wilson

When you stop being afraid you feel good

Spencer Johnson

Marriage is a mistake every man should make.

George Jessel

For my own part, I had rather suffer any inconvenience from having to work occasionally in chambers and kitchen... than witness the subservience in which the menial class is held in Europe.

Harriet Martineau

I applied for your love like a recent MBA grad might apply at Walmart today. I grew a beard on my chest and laughed through my ass just to get your attention.

Jarod Kintz

If the poor only had profiles there would be no difficulty in solving the problem of poverty

Oscar Wilde

Thus we feed on genius, and refresh ourselves from too much conversation with our mates, and exult in the depth of nature in that direction in which he leads us. What indemnification is one great man for populations of pigmies! Every mother wishes one son a genius, though all the rest should be mediocre. But a new danger appears in the excess of influence of the great man. His attractions warp us from our place. We have become underlings and intellectual suicides. Ah! yonder in the horizon is our help;- other great men, new qualities, counterweights and checks on each other. We cloy of the honey of each peculiar greatness. Every hero becomes a bore at last. Perhaps Voltaire was not bad-hearted, yet he said of the good Jesus, even, I pray you, let me never hear that man's name again. They cry up the virtues of George Washington,- Damn George Washington! is the poor Jacobin's whole speech and confutation. But it is human nature's indispensable defense. The centripetence augments the centrifugence. We balance one man with his opposite, and the health of the state depends on the see-saw.

Ralph Waldo Emerson, The Complet