You know how both life and porno movies end. The only difference is life starts with the orgasm.

The disgraced Usurer Yankel D took the baby girl home that evening... He made a bed of crumpled newspaper in a deep baking pan and gently tucked it in the oven, so that she wouldn't be disturbed by the noise of the small falls outside... When he pulled her out to feed her or just hold her, her body was tattooed with the newsprint... Sometimes he would rock her to sleep in his arms, and read her left to right, and know everything he needed to know about the world. If it wasn't written on her, it wasn't important to him.

Jonathan Safran Foer

Once I accomplish one thing and I'm satisfied, I try something else. I may be 50 and doing something totally outside of music and acting. Maybe I'll become a kindergarten teacher.

Kid Cudi

I postpone death by living, by suffering, by error, by risking, by giving, by losing.

Anais Nin

Dawn, ever bearing some divine increase Of beauty, love, and wisdom round the world, Dawn, like a wild-rose in the fields of heaven Washed grey with dew, awoke, and found the barque At anchor in a little land-locked bay.

Alfred Noyes

God can't give us peace and happiness apart from Himself because there is no such thing.

C.S. Lewis

The danger of the past was that men became slaves. The danger of the future is that men may become robots. True enough, robots do not rebel. But given man's nature, robots cannot live and remain sane, they become Golems, they will destroy their world and themselves because they cannot stand any longer the boredom of a meaningless life.

Erich Fromm

Everything is nothing. Everything is all. All is one. One is inconceivable, infinite. Therefore it is nothing. Everything is matter. Matter is electricity. Electricity is invisible, intangible. Therefore it is nothing. Therefore, everything is nothing. Atoms are made up of electrons and protons. (Protons are also nothing) Fifty billion electrons placed side to side in a straight line would stretch across the diameter of the period at the end of this sentence. Protons are heavier and take up less space. Such an idea is incapable of absorption by the human mind.

John Lardner

I'm trying to die correctly, but it's very difficult, you know.

Lawrence Durrell

If something can go wrong it will.

(Edward A. Murphy Murphy's Law

But I didn't ask to have somebody nose around in my private life. I didn't even ask to be famous. All I asked was to be able to earn a living making people laugh.

Carol Burnett

We often have need of a profound philosophy to restore to our feelings their original state of innocence, to find our way out of the rubble of things alien to us, to begin to feel for ourselves and to speak ourselves, and I might almost say to exist ourselves.

G. C. (Georg Christoph) Lichtenb

Having Down syndrome is like being born normal. I am just like you and you are just like me. We are all born in different ways, that is the way I can describe it. I have a normal life.

Chris Burke