Once in his life, every man is entitled to fall madly in love with a gorgeous redhead.

When I woke up this morning my girlfriend asked me, 'Did you sleep good' I said 'No, I made a few mistakes.'

Steven Wright

Hope founded upon a human being, a man-made philosophy or any institution is always misplaced... because these things are unreliable and fleeting.

Charles Stanley

Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit.

Oscar Wilde

It can't be overstated how wonderful it is not to have to audition any more. Any actor will tell you, it's like Christmas.

Bill Nighy

Of all the hazards, fear is the worst.

Sam Snead

If man were immortal he could be perfectly sure of seeing the day when everything in which he had trusted should betray his trust, and, in short, of coming eventually to hopeless misery. He would break down, at last, as every good fortune, as every dynasty, as every civilization does. In place of this we have death.

Charles Sanders Pierce

Confidence is that feeling by which the mind embarks in great and honorable courses with a sure hope and trust in itself.

Marcus Tullius Cicero

Theatre sports is the best improv training period.

Wayne Brady

But being in the closet uniquely assisted me in politics. From my first run for the state legislature until my election as governor, all too often I was not leading but following my best guess at public opinion.

James McGreevey

You cannot create experience. You must undergo it.

Albert Camus

A good neighbor is a fellow who smiles at you over the back fence, but doesn't climb over it.

Arthur Baer

All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.

Leo Tolstoy