I never thought of myself as like, a funny person.

I am a huge fan of gays. They love me, and I love them. They think of me as sort of a gay icon.

Tori Spelling

Classics which at home are drowsily read have a strange charm in a country inn, or in the transom of a merchant brig.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Wit is a weapon. Jokes are a masculine way of inflicting superiority. But humor is the pursuit of a gentle grin, usually in solitude.

Frank Muir

I don't want to play golf. When I hit a ball, I want someone else to go chase it.

Rogers Hornsby

Living well is the best revenge.

George Herbert, Jacula Prudentum

In my early 20s I was so miserable doing construction, I wanted something that paid money. I liked nice stuff. I liked cars and architecture, and things that cost money. I wanted to not swing a hammer, and make money... and not do stuff that was dirty. I attempted to get into comedy. I started to do stand-up, but I wasn't very good at it.

Adam Carolla

I used to work a lot on food issues and every time somebody predicted that production would be inadequate they got egg on their face a year or two later.

Susan George

Human beings are ultimately nothing but carriers-passageways- for genes. They ride us into the ground like racehorses from generation to generation. Genes don't think about what constitutes good or evil. They don't care whether we are happy or unhappy. We're just means to an end for them. The only thing they think about is what is most efficient for them.

Haruki Murakami

If the goal of health-care reform is to provide comprehensive, universal health care in a cost-effective way, the only honest approach is a single-payer approach.

Bernie Sanders

I prepare for the worst, but hope for the best.

Jackie Chan

So I try not to have any actual expectations for myself for any level of success or failure.

Gavin DeGraw

The history of free men is never really written by chance but by choice; their choice!

Dwight D Eisenhower