Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in one ahead.

Love never claims, it ever gives; love never suffers, never resents, never revenges itself. Where there is love there is life; hatred leads to destruction.

Mahatma Gandhi

Dates that come around every year help us measure progress in our lives. One annual event, New Year's Day, is a time of reflection and resolution.

Joseph B. Wirthlin

Coffee is a way of stealing time that should by rights belong to your older self.

Terry Pratchett

My father was always a straight-up funny guy. He was silly. He was my inspiration.

Mike Myers

But if something funny happens, I can't resist. I have to tell the people.

Kathy Griffin

What we call fundamental truths are simply the ones we discover after all the others.

Albert Camus

It is better for a woman to compete impersonally in society, as men do, than to compete for dominance in her own home with her husband, compete with her neighbors for empty status, and so smother her son that he cannot compete at all.

Betty Friedan

Someday, Will, I will go where none can follow me, and I think it will be sooner rather than later. Have you ever asked yourself why I agreed to be your parabatai?

Cassandra Clare

They who have decided to dedicate their lives to spiritual perfection will never be dissatisfied or unhappy, because all that they want is in their power.

Leo Tolstoy

And while thoulivest, dear Kate, take a fellow of plain anduncoined constancy; for he perforce must do theeright, because he hath not the gift to woo in otherplaces: for these fellows of infinite tongue, thatcan rhyme themselves into ladies' favours, they doalways reason themselves out again. What! aspeaker is but a prater; a rhyme is but a ballad. Agood leg will fall; a straight back will stoop; ablack beard will turn white; a curled pate will growbald; a fair face will wither; a full eye will waxhollow: but a good heart, Kate, is the sun and themoon; or, rather, the sun, and not the moon; for itshines bright and never changes, but keeps hiscourse truly. If thou would have such a one, takeme; and take me, take a soldier; take a soldier,take a king. And what sayest thou then to my love?speak, my fair, and fairly, I pray thee

William Shakespeare

When I had a job catering, I catered a wedding for the Smashing Pumpkins bassist in Indiana. And I served Billy Corgan shrimp off a tray.

Amy Poehler

Truth and honesty are quite different. What a person believes to be true always follows when honesty leads the way. But truth can be asserted when one is being dishonest as well.

Eric Parslow