Politics is pop. Our job as comedians - especially me, as a late-night talk show, which is a broader audience - is to amplify what we think America is thinking.

I once went out with this wild girl. She made French toast and got her tongue caught in the toaster.

Rodney Dangerfield

Visiting the sick' is an orgasm of superiority in the contemplation of our neighbor's helplessness

Friedrich Nietzsche

Let everyone sweep in front of his own door, and the whole world will be clean.

Johann von Goethe

You smile with pomp and rigor, you talk of benevolence and virtue; I act with benevolence and virtue and get murdered time after time.

William Blake

Beware of the ides of March.

William Shakespeare

The great corporations of this country were not founded by ordinary people. They were founded by people with extraordinary intelligence, ambition, and aggressiveness.

Daniel Patrick Moynihan

And of course, in my writing, there is the constant theme of music, love of, preoccupation with, music. Music is the single thread making my life into a coherency.... It's my job and my vice mixed together. You can't hope for better than that: having your job and your sin commingled.

Philip K. Dick

All faults may be forgiven of him who has perfect candor.

Walt Whitman

The wonders of the Grand Canyon cannot be adequately represented in symbols of speech, nor by speech itself. The resources of the graphic art are taxed beyond their powers in attempting to portray its features. Language and illustration combined must fail.

John Wesley Powell

Art is the lie that enables us to realize the truth.

Pablo Picasso

Sadness flies away on the wings of time.

Jean de La Fontaine

Die Sinnlichkeit übereilt oft das Wachsthum der Liebe, so dass die Wurzel schwach bleibt und leicht auszureissen ist.

Friedrich Nietzsche