I went to the store and bought lady fingers, when I got home I noticed one of the fingers was missing so I went back to the store and the manager was nice enough to give me the finger.

What I'm doing is art - it's low-brow art but there's a magic in that.

Kesha

Christmas albums are not something you do frequently.

Isaac Hanson

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.

Doug Larson

When you become detached mentally from yourself and concentrate on helping other people with their difficulties, you will be able to cope with your own more effectively. Somehow, the act of self-giving is a personal power-releasing factor.

Norman Vincent Peale

I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said 'Are you going to help?' I said 'No, six should be enough.'

Les Dawson

Freedom is that instant between when someone tells you to do something and when you decide how to respond.

Dr. Jeffrey Borenstein

We must picture hell as a state where everyone is perpetually concerned about his own dignity and advancement, where everyone has a grievance, and where everyone lives with the deadly serious passions of envy, self-importance, and resentment.

C.S. Lewis

My own feeling is that human happiness is a very random thing, and bestows itself willy-nilly, and there's not much deserving about the matter.

Orson Scott Card

The success of any great moral enterprise does not depend upon numbers.

William Lloyd Garrison

Ritual will always mean throwing away something: destroying our corn or wine upon the altar of our gods.

G. K. Chesterton

There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus.

Mark Twain

I was always interested in French poetry sort of as a sideline to my own work, I was translating contemporary French poets. That kind of spilled out into translation as a way to earn money, pay for food and put bread on the table.

Paul Auster