If you're a sports fan you realize that when you meet somebody, like a girlfriend, they kind of have to root for your team. They don't have a choice.

The point is that descriptive writing is very rarely entirely accurate and during the reign of Olaf Quimby II as Patrician of Ankh-Morpork some legislation was passed in a determined attempt to put a stop to this sort of thing and introduce some honesty to reporting.Thus, if a legend told of a notable hero that all men spoke of his prowess any bard who valued his life would hastily add except for a couple of people in his home village who thought he was a loony, and quite a lot of other people who had never really heard of him. Poetic simile was strictly limited to statements like: His mighty steed was fast as the wind, on a fairly calm day, say about Force Three, any loose talk about a beloved having a face that could launch a thousand ships would have to be backed by evidence that the object of desire did indeed own a very large seaport. Patrician Olaf II was eventually killed during an experiment conducted in the palace grounds to prove the disputed accuracy of the proverb The Pen is mightier than the Sword.In his memory it was decided that the proverb would from now on include the phrase: only if the Sword is very small and the Pen very sharp.

Terry Pratchett

The weather is like the government, always in the wrong.

Jerome K. Jerome

And one of his partners asked Has he vertigo? and the other glanced out and down and said Oh no, only about ten feet more.

Ogden Nash

There is a time of life somewhere between the sullen fugues of adolescence and the retrenchments of middle age when human nature becomes so absolutely absorbing one wants to be in the city constantly, even at the height of summer.

Edward Hoagland

If I repent of anything, it is very likely to be my good behavior.

Henry David Thoreau

It takes two to quarrel, but only one to end it.

Proverb

I have to confess that I had gambled on my soul and lost it with heroic insouciance and lightness of touch. The soul is so impalpable, so often useless, and sometimes such a nuisance, that I felt no more emotion on losing it than if, on a stroll, I had mislaid my visiting card.

Charles Baudelaire

Religions are different roads converging to the same point. What does it matter that we take different road, so long as we reach the same goal. Wherein is the cause for quarreling?

Mahatma Gandhi

Ye golden hours of Life's young spring, Of innocence, of love and truth! Bright, beyond all imagining, Thou fairy-dream of youth! I'd give all wealth that years have piled, The slow result of Life's decay, To be once more a little child For one bright summer-day.

Lewis Carroll

America is the civilization of people engaged in transforming themselves. In the past, the stars of the performance were the pioneer and the immigrant. Today, it is youth and the Black.

Harold Rosenberg

The real business of life is trying to understand each other.

Gilbert Parker

But there was happiness elsewhere which no description can reach.

Jane Austen