If I had my way books would not be written in English, but in an exceedingly difficult secret language that only skilled professional readers and story-tellers could interpret. Then people like you would have to go to public halls and pay good prices to hear the professionals decode and read the books aloud for you. This plan would have the advantage of scaring off all amateur authors, retired politicians, country doctors and I-Married-a-Midget writers who would not have the patience to learn the secret language.

Summary

This quote expresses the speaker's desire for books to be written in a complex secret language that only trained readers and storytellers can understand. The idea is that this would prevent amateurs and mediocre writers from producing books in English. The speaker suggests that the public would then have to attend paid events to listen to these professionals decode and read the books aloud. The purpose of this plan is to elevate the quality of literature and exclude those lacking the dedication to learn the secret language.

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