The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.

I have a son in college. He's majoring in F.....g up.

Rodney Dangerfield

Safeguarding the rights of others is the most noble and beautiful end of a human being.

Kahlil Gibran

Margo always loved mysteries. And in everything that came afterward, I could never stop thinking that maybe she loved mysteries so much that she became one.

John Green

I have no greater joy then to hear that my children walk in truth. John 4

Bible

My parents, grandparents, aunts and uncles were all funny, and I felt that energy, that delivery, that timing, that sarcasm. All that stuff seeped into my brain.

Jeff Ross

Nothing can be done except little by little.

Charles Baudelaire

War will never cease until babies begin to come into the world with larger cerebrums and smaller adrenal glands.

H. L. Mencken

I'm cute - and God I hate that. Because that's not cool. I'm like your niece, and nobody wants to date their niece. It's the chubby cheeks. The whole reason people voted for me on American Idol is because I'm an everyday, normal girl.

Kelly Clarkson

I have an idea that the phrase 'weaker sex' was coined by some woman to disarm the man she was preparing to overwhelm.

Ogden Nash

If my dream comes true, Is truth then only a dream?

Rob Bignell

To the outside world we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other's hearts. We share private family jokes. We remember family feuds and secrets, family griefs and joys. We live outside the touch of time.

Clara Ortega

When times are tough and people are frustrated and angry and hurting and uncertain, the politics of constant conflict may be good, but what is good politics does not necessarily work in the real world. What works in the real world is cooperation.

William J. Clinton