Quote by Lord Chesterfield
Whoever is admitted or sought for, in company, upon any other account than that of his merit and manners, is never respected there, but only made use of. We will have such-a-one, for he sings prettily; we will invite such-a-one to a ball, for he dances well; we will have such-a-one at supper, for he is always joking and laughing; we will ask another because he plays deep at all games, or because he can drink a great deal. These are all vilifying distinctions, mortifying preferences, and exclude all ideas of esteem and regard. Whoever is had (as it is called) in company for the sake of any one thing singly, is singly that thing, and will never be considered in any other light; consequently never respected, let his merits be what they will.
Summary
This quote highlights the importance of being valued for one's genuine qualities and character. It argues that seeking someone's company solely for superficial reasons, such as their talent in singing or dancing, sense of humor, gambling skills, or ability to consume alcohol, diminishes the respect they receive. By reducing individuals to a specific attribute, they are devalued and prevented from being regarded as well-rounded individuals deserving of esteem. Therefore, true respect and regard can only be achieved by recognizing someone's entirety, rather than focusing on one aspect of their being.
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