Robert Benchley Quotes

A collection of quotes by Robert Benchley.

Robert Benchley (1889-1945) was an American humorist, writer, and actor. Born in Worcester, Massachusetts, he was known for his wit and satirical observations on everyday life.

Benchley began his career as a journalist, working as a drama critic for various newspapers. In 1919, he moved to New York City and joined the staff of Vanity Fair magazine, where he quickly gained recognition for his humorous essays and reviews. His distinctive writing style, characterized by clever wordplay and absurd situations, made him a popular figure in the literary circles of the 1920s.

Throughout his career, Benchley wrote numerous essays and columns for publications such as The New Yorker and Life magazine. His works covered a wide range of topics, including politics, relationships, and the quirks of modern life. Benchley often employed self-deprecating humor, portraying himself as a bumbling, slightly bewildered character, which endeared him to readers.

In addition to his writing, Benchley also ventured into acting. He appeared in several films during the 1930s and 1940s, often playing a humorous version of himself. His distinctive delivery and comedic timing made him a popular personality on the silver screen.

Robert Benchley's influence on American humor can still be felt today. Known for his witty observations and satirical commentaries, he remains a beloved figure in the world of comedy.

It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for wri

It took me fifteen years to discover I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.

Robert Benchley


Tell us your phobias and we will tell you what you are afrai

Tell us your phobias and we will tell you what you are afraid of.

Robert Benchley


There are two kinds of people in the world, those who believ

There are two kinds of people in the world, those who believe there are two kinds of people in the world and those who don't.

Robert Benchley


In America there are two classes of travel: first class and

In America there are two classes of travel: first class and with childen.

Robert Benchley


It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent fo

It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I coudn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.

Robert Benchley


You might think that after thousands of years of coming up t

You might think that after thousands of years of coming up too soon and getting frozen, the crocus family would have had a little sense knocked into it.

Robert Benchley


Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are al

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that a child cannot do much harm one way or another.

Robert Benchley


I am more the inspirational type of speller. I work on hunch

I am more the inspirational type of speller. I work on hunches rather than mere facts, and the result is sometimes open to criticism by purists.

Robert Benchley

Work Results Inspirational

Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such foo

Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with it's just compounding the felony.

Robert Benchley

Drinking

Nothing is more responsible for the good old days than a bad

Nothing is more responsible for the good old days than a bad memory.

Robert Benchley

Memory

Go jogging? What, and get hit by a meteor?

Go jogging? What, and get hit by a meteor?

Robert Benchley

Exercise

A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and th

A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.Another version:A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.

Robert Benchley

Dogs

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work

Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.

Robert Benchley

Work

Tell us your phobias, and we will tell you what you are afra

Tell us your phobias, and we will tell you what you are afraid of.

Robert Benchley

Fear

I must get out of these wet clothes and into a dry Martini.

I must get out of these wet clothes and into a dry Martini.

Robert Benchley

Drinking

As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as

As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did.

Robert Benchley

Age

The naturalistic literature of this country has reached such

The naturalistic literature of this country has reached such a state that no family of characters is considered true to life which does not include at least two hypochondriacs, one sadist, and one old man who spills food down the front of his vest.

Robert Benchley

Books

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn arou

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down.

Robert Benchley

Pet

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, an

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children.

Robert Benchley

Travel

The biggest obstacle to professional writing is the necessit

The biggest obstacle to professional writing is the necessity for changing a typewriter ribbon.

Robert Benchley

Authors & Writing