Funny Quotes

A Man who has never lied to a woman has no respect for her feeling.

William Nsubuga

I fell in love with football as I was later to fall in love with women: suddenly, inexplicably, uncritically, giving no thought to the pain or disruption it would bring with it.

Nick Hornby

I would really love to do a musical, I don't know in what capacity but something funny.

Billie Piper

What smells good may not always taste good, I leaned this the day I tried to eat a scented candle.

Kenny D. Eichenberg

Why, my goodness, honey. After looking at all those pictures of seraphic and perspirationless babes for so long in the privacy of a foxhole, what is a poor doughfoot going to do when he comes home and discovers that American women are, after all, biological and given, under stress, to shiny noses?

Margaret Mitchell

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife,' I said, sighing.'Is it?' said Veronica, looking surprised. 'Universally acknowledged? Surely that presupposes life similar to human societies beyond this planet, and besides--''No, no, it's a quote from ... Never mind,' I said.

Michelle Cooper

Life sucks, then you die. Then it sucks again.

Tonya Hurley

I'm not afraid of dying. I'm afraid I'll never get a chance to live!

A.A. Bell

Whatever one does, someone is always happy...then again, someone else is not pleased

ArLeaBelle

Everything is Good,Some of the things are better,But, Nothing is the Best in this World.....!

Amod Shrivastava

All the time you're saying to yourself, 'I could do that, but I won't,'--which is just another way of saying that you can't.

Richard P. Feynman

I really am happy for Kiley. And for you and every other happily married lady. Except for that I'm not happy for you. I kind of want you all to drop dead.

Rainbow Rowell

And if, by the end [of this book], you reckon you might still disagree with me, then I offer you this: you'll still be wrong, but you'll be wrong with a lot more panache and flair than you could possibly manage right now.

Ben Goldacre

No! Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.

George Lucas

I can't imagine the scientists wanting me to walk into the lab and start fiddling around with some big bowl of electrons they had out.

Jim Benton

There's always a but. It's a magical word. You can say anything you want, go on for as long as you want, and then all you have to do is add the magic word and instantly everything you said is erased, turned meaningless, just like that.

Charles Benoit

Raise a smile and lower stress

Benny Bellamacina

Rock 'n' roll is not red carpets and MySpace friends, rock'n'roll is dangerous and should piss people off

Gerard Way

Never travel faster than your guardian angel can fly.

Mother Teresa

I'm probably something like 95% chicken nugget

Jeff Kinney