Scientists have invented a new strain of cannabis without the high. They celebrated with non-alcoholic beer and furious dry-humping.

For almost seventy years the life insurance industry has been a smug sacred cow feeding the public a steady line of sacred bull.

Ralph Nader

It's our nature: Human beings like success but they hate successful people.

Carrot Top

I really don't know anything else because my brothers were famous when I was two years old. So I know nothing else, no other life.

Janet Jackson

My eyes went straight to a soft woman who sat facing the wrong way at the bar top. Soft, because I knew if I were to touch her skin, it would feel like a peach, the kind of woman you could almost smell from inside the building. Instead of facing Andy, she had her back to him, keeping an eye on the door. That must be her. Her hair was exquisite. She was really the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. A golden crown of braids and curls complimented her sun-kissed skin. Her dress draped perfectly over her body, and in that moment, I needed her more than I needed air.

Chelsie Shakespeare

Peeing is like a good book in that it is very, very hard to stop once you start.

John Green

The martyr cannot be dishonored. Every lash inflicted is a tongue of fame; every prison a more illustrious abode.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

The pressure makes me more intent about each shot. Pressure on the last few holes makes me play better.

Nancy Lopez

I look at Jagger and the like and if I see a good attitude I'll admire it but I wouldn't copy their style.

Michael Hutchence

That is the earth, he thought. Not a globe thousands of kilometers around, but a forest with a shining lake, a house hidden at the crest of a hill, high in the trees, a grassy slope leading upwards from the water, fish leaping and birds strafing to take the bugs that lived at the border between water and sky. Earth was the constant noise of crickets, and winds, and birds

Orson Scott Card

If you don't get everything you want, think of the things you don't get that you don't want.

Source Unknown

And I think my sexuality was heavily repressed by the church, by the, you know, the design of the mortal sins.

Thomas Keneally

Rush Limbaugh, we expect nonsense from him. But the Vatican, that's another story. When the Vatican is so threatened that it launches attacks on nuns, well, you know what they say in politics, a hit dog hollers.

Jennifer M. Granholm