Stephen Colbert Quotes

A collection of quotes by Stephen Colbert.

Stephen Colbert is an American comedian, writer, producer, and television host, best known for his witty political commentary. He was born on May 13, 1964, in Washington, D.C., and grew up in a Catholic family. Colbert attended Northwestern University, where he studied theater and performed with the improv group, Second City.

After college, Colbert worked for various comedy shows, including "Saturday Night Live" and "The Daily Show with Jon Stewart." In 2005, he launched his own program, "The Colbert Report," on Comedy Central. The show satirized conservative political pundits and gained widespread acclaim for Colbert's unique blend of humor and political satire.

Colbert's quick wit, charismatic persona, and sharp intellect earned him a devoted following. He was known for his character, a parody of right-wing talk show hosts, who spoke with complete conviction about absurd ideas and events.

In 2014, Colbert was selected as the successor to David Letterman on "The Late Show" on CBS. Transitioning from his satirical persona, he has since become a more multi-dimensional host, while still offering his unique brand of humor. Through his late-night show, Colbert continues to engage with current issues, interview politicians, celebrities, and bring his comedic voice to American television.

Throughout his career, Stephen Colbert has received numerous accolades, including several Primetime Emmy Awards, Grammy Awards, and Writers Guild of America Awards. He remains a prominent figure in American late-night television, known for his sharp wit, insightful commentary, and entertaining interviews.

Truthiness is what you want the facts to be as opposed to wh

Truthiness is what you want the facts to be as opposed to what the facts are. What feels like the right answer as opposed to what reality will support.

Stephen Colbert

Truth

We decided that my character had a pre-show tradition, like

We decided that my character had a pre-show tradition, like a ritual, which was to sing the lyrics to I Want You To Want Me by Cheap Trick into the mirror. Because, more than anything else, as much as he says he's bringing the truth, he just wants to be liked.

Stephen Colbert

Truth Character Tradition

And I just like the guy. He's a good joe. Obviously loves hi

And I just like the guy. He's a good joe. Obviously loves his wife, calls her his better half, and polls show America agrees.

Stephen Colbert

Love

Scientists have invented a new strain of cannabis without th

Scientists have invented a new strain of cannabis without the high. They celebrated with non-alcoholic beer and furious dry-humping.

Stephen Colbert

Funny Science Sex Humour Alcohol Beer Twitter Cannabis Non Alcoholic Beverages Non Penetrative Sex Substance Intoxication

There's nothing wrong with stretching the truth. We stretch

There's nothing wrong with stretching the truth. We stretch taffy, and that just makes it more delicious.

Stephen Colbert

Truth

In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be a

In order to maintain an untenable position, you have to be actively ignorant. One motto on the show is, 'Keep your facts, I'm going with the truth.'

Stephen Colbert

Truth

Winning the Nobel Prize does not automatically qualify you t

Winning the Nobel Prize does not automatically qualify you to be commander in chief. I think George Bush has proved definitively that to be president, you don't need to care about science, literature or peace.

Stephen Colbert

Science Peace Literature

I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked,

I just think Rosa Parks was overrated. Last time I checked, she got famous for breaking the law.

Stephen Colbert

Famous

No, my mom kind of led me toward acting. She wanted to be an

No, my mom kind of led me toward acting. She wanted to be an actress when she was younger. That made me interested in it when I was a kid, because she and I are very close.

Stephen Colbert

Mom

Nothingever happened on this globe, for good, at which some

Nothingever happened on this globe, for good, at which some people did not have their fill of laughter in the onset; and knowing that such as these would be blind anyway, he thought it quite as well that they should wrinkle up their eyes in grins, as have a malady in the less attractive forms.

Charles Dickens

Dad

I wrote things for the school's newspaper, and - like all te

I wrote things for the school's newspaper, and - like all teenagers - I dabbled in poetry.

Stephen Colbert

Poetry

I used to make up stuff in my bio all the time, that I used

I used to make up stuff in my bio all the time, that I used to be a professional ice-skater and stuff like that. I found it so inspirational. Why not make myself cooler than I am?

Stephen Colbert

Inspirational