Funny And Random Quotes

Browse through our collection of quotes tagged with Funny And Random.

You saved Dad's life. If anyone's got the right to eavesdrop

You saved Dad's life. If anyone's got the right to eavesdrop on him, it's you.

Funny And Random

Nothingever happened on this globe, for good, at which some

Nothingever happened on this globe, for good, at which some people did not have their fill of laughter in the onset; and knowing that such as these would be blind anyway, he thought it quite as well that they should wrinkle up their eyes in grins, as have a malady in the less attractive forms.

Charles Dickens

Dad

-Oh yes? Can you identify yourself?-Certainly. I'd know me a

-Oh yes? Can you identify yourself?-Certainly. I'd know me anywhere.

Terry Pratchett

Humor Funny Satire Wit Humorous Funny And Random Comeback Witty Quotes

(About a cookbook...)- What about this one? Maids of Honor?-

(About a cookbook...)- What about this one? Maids of Honor?- Weeelll, they starts OUT as Maids of Honor...but they ends up Tarts.

Terry Pratchett

Humor Funny Satire Witty Wit Humorous Funny And Random Comebacks Retort

Remember, I'm the only person her who's paid to be nice to y

Remember, I'm the only person her who's paid to be nice to you. But not too nice. Give me any lip and I'll break your face. OK?

Orson Scott Card

Science Violence Funny And Random